Player vs. player - or "The golden rule of roleplaying"

In our last game, the issue of player vs. player action came up. More specifically, one player said that his character did a mind control on another players character. This wasn't appreciated by the other player, who was open with it, so the first player changed his course of action.

The incident, however, got me thinking (and spurred some discussions on the groups Wave about the game). Several solutions were presented, like making that particular character immune to Domination etc, however, I think that those kinds of things should be settled outside of the game.

Now, the easy way is to say that "no player vs. player actions whatsoever". I think, however, that there is a deeper lesson to be learned. First of all, I'd like to separate character vs. character from player vs. player. Instead of making the situation a contest that one of the players win, make it a collaborative effort. First suggest (humbly) something along the lines of "It would fit the story and my character, and is a part of his downwards journey, if he tried to Dominate you in this particular situation. Would that be ok with you, and how would you like to play this out?" If, and only if, the second player agrees, the scene can be played out. The rules can still be used to decide if the power works, but the two players work together to make the scene interesting. This way, even though the character looses control, the player doesn't.

You can then add in a "give-and-take" approach, like the player running the controlled character can say something like "yes, you control my character for a little while, but in the process, he get's an insight into your mind, learning something from you", or something along those lines. But remember, this is an example of what can be done in addition to the above collaborative work.

The important part is that both players enjoy the situation and finds it interesting. In Swedish traffic law, there is the basic rule that basically states that "All drivers should at all times do as mush as possible to avoid accidents". That is the most important law, and all other laws are specifications and concrete rules about how to uphold/ fulfill that first law. That way of thinking could be applied to roleplaying games as well, written something like this:

"All players should at all times work towards making the game as 

enjoyable as possible for all participants"

That, my dear friends, is what I would call the "Golden Rule of Roleplaying"